¿Es bueno templarse?

Estos días estuve revisando alguna ideas propias acerca de las relaciones de pareja. No puedo negar que muchas de estas ideas me han sido inculcadas desde pequeño y muchas veces las acepto como verdades indiscutibles o simplemente no reparo en observarlas. Pero muchas veces he caído en la cuenta que algunos de estos conceptos míos y creo que va para todos también, están muchas veces errados y en algunos casos fuera de la realidad.

Por ejemplo se acepta como una verdad indiscutible en nuestra sociedad que el hombre tiene que pagarlo todo cuando sale con una chica. Era algo que me parecía muy normal hasta hace poco. Encontraba muchas razones para ello, la primera obviamente era que los hombres ganan más que las mujeres. Los hombres por otro lado son los que siempre deben llevar la iniciativa del caso. Y como ellos invitan bueno pues que ellos paguen. Pero qué sucede si es la chica la que gana más que el chico. Esto me hace recordar a un amigo que digamos ganaba en su momento 800 soles. Su enamorada ganaba 1200 y sin embargo el pagaba siempre todas las salidas inclusive cuando su pareja le decía para ir a medias. Me parecía lo más raro del mundo. Cuando le pregunte por qué no aceptaba que su enamorada lo apoye me dijo: “No ps, como le voy a dejar que me pague si yo soy el hombre”. Por dentro pense: “¿Y?” y me reí. No encontraba ningún fundamento sólido más alla de nuestras propias idiosincracias.

Este escenario permite también que surjan seres tipo los chupacabras pero versión femenina que se aprovechan de esta inusitada regla de caballerosidad para drenar lentamente los vasos sanguíneos de sus eventuales víctimas. Pero bueno este tema tal vez sea motivo de otro post.

La idea que quiero revisar ahora es la siguiente: ¿Es bueno templarse? o mejor dicho ¿Es bueno dejar que tus sentimientos te lleven a donde quieran llevarte?. Lo digo en el sentido más noble posible. Entiendo perfectamente que templarse de alguien es algo muy agradable, muy rico, muy embriagante. Que el hecho de perder completamente la cabeza por alguien al punto de no saber lo que se esta haciendo o permitir cosas que nunca pensabamos que ibamos a permitir es algo que muchos anhelan y buscan con tesón. No los culpo. Para quien ha estado templado la sensación es muy especial. El sentido de bienestar que lo rodea puede hacer que minimice muchas situaciones inclusive peligrosas. Y ese más o menos es el punto al que quería llegar. Si templarnos nos lleva a abandonar nuestra identidad, a permitir situaciones que objetivamente no deseamos, a dejar de lado amigos, cursos en el colegio o en la universidad, a nuestros padres, pienso que algo esta andando mal. No critíco el amor apasionado, pero discrepo del amor acéfalo, de un amor que no sabe en que dirección va y que va caminando de tumbo en tumbo.

catdog

Como comenté alguna vez templarse es muy arriegado. Uno entra en una situación de debilidad emocional que te deja muy vulnerable, muy sensible al entorno. Y es entonces que tu pareja se puede aprovechar de esta circunstancia, de su poder o dominio sobre tí para utilizarte. Lamentablemente es difícil que esto no ocurra especialmente en nuestros tiempos donde las relaciones de pareja estan muy marcadas por el dominio y el placer.

Debo reconocer que el punto extremo o sea no templarse, es un situación inhumana. El estar enamorado es como el combustible de la relación pero insisto, pienso que no debemos llenarnos tanto de ese combustible que corramos el peligro de arder. Ama con el corazón pero piensa con la cabeza. O como dicen todo en su justa medida.

RG

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Publicado en Busco enamorada a la(s) 09:29 el día jueves 21 mayo por
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  1. Joseca escribió:

    Creo que tu opinion es tan válida como la de cualquier opinión de cualquier ser humano. Lo que sí creo q es que estas generalizando tu o tus experiencias del "templarse" eso pros y cons que te suceden a ti, tal vez sea balanceado o uno sea mas que otro, para el resto puede ser distinto o coincidente. No generalices amigo mío, ese es un grave error. Saludos

  2. Azu escribió:

    "Ama con el corazón pero piensa con la cabeza" …. que difícil.
    No hay nada como dejarse llevar y no bloquearse por los pensamientos.

    Y sí, así como existen mujeres sangronas, existen hombres fanfarrones que creen que con dinero te van a impresionar o los que piensan que si te pagan las cosas tienen algún tipo de derecho sobre tí.

    En una relación no se debe contar cuanto das. Si te nace lo haces y punto y eso lo digo tanto como para el hombre y la mujer.

    Azu.
    Hay de todo.

  3. maria escribió:

    Creo que tienes miedo a sufrir, al abandono, y como decias prefieres el desapego(en el blog de tu padre), es bueno y malo porque no te permite expresarte y sentir, y con respecto a tu papá el no va a cambiar tienes que hacerlo tu, a mi tambien me paso y cambie yo para mi felicidad. buena vida para todos

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    cuando amas no calculas cuanto gastas, no piensas si te engaña, y aun lo razonal esta presente el amor es un ideal que todos apesar de haber pasado las peores situaciones las buscamos, yo lo busco y si tengo que besar a mil sapos eso me hace estar mas cerca del amor que otros que tienen miedo a sentir.

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